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The house we're renting is located on a golf course, and about thirty feet behind the house there's a water hazard, where, I've recently learned, lives an alligator. I have to say this freaks me out a little. After all, isn't an alligator basically a dinosaur? And a vicious man eating predator, at that?

It's especially scary when our pug, Maddy (aka Gator Bait), makes a break for it, and races out the door as she did this morning. In the past when she's done this, I usually just start singing Born Free, which Maddy finds insulting. But in light of the alligator situation, I felt obligated to chase her down this morning.

George and I have even discussed what to do if the alligator does come charging out of the water after her, with the intention of having a doggy Hors d'oeuvre.

"Don't tangle with the alligator, no matter what," I advised him.

"What if it's a small alligator? If it's only a few feet long, I think I could take it," George said.

Sometimes I feel like we're living in the middle of a Carl Hiaasen novel.

Posted 06 August 2004 at 11:25 AM