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Sam is usually a pretty easy going, drama-free kid. Up until this morning, which has been going something like this:

Step One: Sam grabs George's belt (as George is attempting to put on said belt), clutches it joyfully to his chest, and then immediately sticks it in his mouth.

Step Two: I grapple with him for a minute before succeeding in wrenching the belt out of his kung fu grip. I return the belt to George.

Step Three: Sam throws himself on the ground and sobs. His face turns red. Tears roll down his cheeks.

Step Four: I give Sam a cuddle, and than distract him with a toy. This works for a few minutes, until Sam sets his sights on his toothbrush. Or my shoe. Or the dog's leash. Or a pair of scissors.* Or shards of broken glass.* Or a flaming torch.*

Step Five: Go back to Step One. Repeat all steps.

*No need to call Child Protective Services. I'm exaggerating on the fire, glass and scissors because it makes the post funnier. Really, try reading it without those examples. Not as funny, right?

Posted 21 October 2004 at 09:38 AM