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George: Hi! I'm home!

Me: [to Sam] Daddy's home! Go show him your new haircut.

Sam: Hi, Daddy!

George: Oh. My. God. What happened to his head?

Me: I cut his hair. Don't you like it?

George: It's just so . . . so . . . short. Why'd you give him a buzz cut?

Me: I started off cutting it, and it was uneven, so I had to keep taking more and more off.

George: He looks like a soldier. Or a convict.

Me: Well. It is getting warmer out. I thought this would be practical. So you really don't like it?

George: No. I really don't like it. I think he looked better with hair.

Me: I thought I did as good a job as the barber.

George: No. You didn't.

Me: But the barber gave him a really bad haircut last time. It's better than that.

George: Ummm . . . no, hon, it really isn't. It's uneven. And choppy. And what are these long pieces? It looks like you completely missed a few spots with the razor.

Me: [defensively] Well, he was moving around a lot while I was cutting. Geez. I did the best I could . . .

Posted 01 April 2006 at 02:45 PM