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Me: (excitedly) I've had the most amazing idea!

George: What's that?

Me: I'm going to go pick strawberries and make homemade jam!

George: Because you don't have enough to do?

Me: Just think: from now on, we'll have homemade jam! No more store bought! Won't that be fabulous? We'll be just like the early settlers!

George: Making jam on an electric stove in an air conditioned house is just like the early settlers?

Me: Oh, be quiet. You won't be making wise cracks once you taste my delicious homemade jam. You know, I think this could actually change our lives. Maybe we can even move out to the country and start living off the land! We could keep chickens for eggs and a goat!

George: A goat? Why do we need a goat?

Me: To make homemade goat cheese. Duh.

A little later . . .

George: Why are you lying down? What happened to your jam plan?

Me: Hmph.

George: What's wrong?

Me: Do you have any idea how much equipment you have to accumulate in order to make jam? It's not just berries and sugar. You have to have jars, and special caps, and sterilizers, and tongs to get the caps out of the boiling water, and something called Pectin, which I have no idea where you'd even go to buy such a thing, and it just seemed like . . . well, a lot of trouble. So I thought about it, and decided that it would really be easier to just, you know, continue to buy our jam at the grocery store.

George:

Me: What? Why are you laughing?

Posted 23 January 2008 at 09:44 AM